Life Advice
/Health
/ArcaMax

Ask Dating Coach Erika: What do I do when his place is a pigsty?
As always, dating can sometimes feel like a conglomeration of awkward situations, ones we have no idea how to deal with.
I stand by my advice that I give often: I don’t want you to be scared of talking to the very person you supposedly like so much. If they’re a true partner, it will feel like a safe landing place for your concerns and ...Read more

Ask Anna: My partner won't sleep next to me anymore -- what should I do?
Dear Anna,
My boyfriend and I have been together for two years and recently moved in together. Everything was going great until we started sharing a bed regularly. He claims that my breathing keeps him awake at night — not snoring, just my normal breathing sounds. At first I thought he was joking, but he's completely serious.
He's started ...Read more
Millennial Life: Dishing Up What's Needed
Sometimes a reply has to stew. There's the meat of an argument and the vegetables of barbs that soften as the pot simmers over the flames of anger. The flavors shift with time. What first tasted like an insult might mellow into something, even just the imagined context I build for myself of the person on the other side of the screen, like ...Read more
Single File: A Kid's-Eye View
DEAR SUSAN: I've been reading a lot of letters in your column about child support. How about a kid's perspective? My dad never sees me. Why should I want to see him? He owes my siblings and me thousands of dollars' worth of food, clothing, medical treatment, etc. I'm not complaining about apartments that don't have carpet or having to watch ...Read more
Milllennial Life: The Script is Ours to Write
I had a frilly pink dress in second grade that I only wore a handful of times. There are some photos of me striking some sharp poses in our backyard, but after I outgrew that dress, I didn't follow up with any similarly typical frilly costumes of girlhood. As I grew, I went with comfort over style for a long time -- and some might say even to ...Read more
Single File: Cohabitation Quiz
Let's take a summer break from the usual, same-old (yawn) essay format and sprinkle some questions about living together as a lifestyle choice and (quite possibly) rebellion against marriage. My nationwide survey saw it coming, this fast-growing option, but no one could have predicted its overwhelming numbers. As it turns out, this extra-legal ...Read more

I'm the only one asking questions!
In online dating, I often see two competing factors:
1. People genuinely want to meet someone great (or at least they think they do).
2. People are lazy and don’t take the time to do online dating well … or at all.
This conversation happened to a client of mine (the woman in this exchange) on Bumble:
Her: Do you still drink iced coffee ...Read more

Ask Anna: My boyfriend just met my ex-hookup -- now he won't talk to me
Dear Anna,
I was 23 when I finally got my own place. There was this attractive guy who lived down the hall from me and we had some flirty exchanges that eventually led to a hookup. Just a one-time thing, and afterward we'd only exchange quick hellos if we ran into each other. A few months later, I met my current boyfriend, who I've been with ...Read more
Millennial Life: From Ghost Stories to Gatekeeping: Millennials and the New Wave of Book Bans
Starting at about second grade, when the novelty of reading about a family of bears started to wear off, I inhaled ghost stories. One of my favorites was "Wait Till Helen Comes" by Mary Downing Hahn. It was about dead kids, dead parents, and, the cherry on top of a trauma sundae, navigating a blended family.
I was lucky as a child. I didn't ...Read more
Single File: Chairman of the Board
Agreed, the month of May is the usual time for tributes to moms' indispensable role. But mine is an off-season paean to those women who -- by some inscrutable twist of fate -- find themselves Chairman of the Board, responsible for every decision in their husbandless household. Why now, and why them? Because while motherhood is sacred in America,...Read more
Sarcasm and online dating: A tough pair
We’ve all been there: Someone we don’t know extremely well—maybe a work colleague or friend of a friend—sends a biting text that immediately causes you to raise your eyebrows. You may ask friends, “Hey...what do you think this means?” Internally, you’re debating whether you should ever talk to this person again ... or if it was ...Read more

Ask Anna: Love after baby -- Mother's Day advice for exhausted new parents
Dear Anna,
My husband and I welcomed our beautiful daughter six months ago, and while we're absolutely in love with her, I feel like my husband and I are just ships passing in the night. Between diaper changes, feedings and sleep deprivation, our relationship has taken a backseat. Date nights seem like a distant memory, and when we do have a ...Read more

Ask Amy: Exiting with some well-worn wisdom
Dear Readers: Since announcing my departure from writing this syndicated column, I have heard from scores of people across various platforms, thanking me for more than two decades of offering advice and wishing me well in my “retirement.” I am very touched and grateful for this outpouring of support.
The thing is – I don’t think of ...Read more
Inside Life Advice
Popular Stories
- Ask Anna: My boyfriend's fitness comments are hurting my self-esteem
- Ask Anna: Hookup culture burnout and unavailable crush cycles: Pride edition
- Ask Dating Coach Erika: What if my match doesn't ask me any questions?
- Ask Anna: I feel like I'm competing with my boyfriend's hobby for attention
- Ask Anna: Why being inexperienced in bed is a good thing