Nicole Kidman realised she needed to "get a life" when she won her Oscar.

The 59-year-old star won the prestigious Best Actress Academy Award in2 003 for her role as Virginia Wolf in The Hours and while she was "so grateful" for the recognition, she also felt very sad because she was "so lonely" in the aftermath of the event.

Speaking on the Therapuss podcast, Nicole - who had divorced first husband Tom Cruise in 2001 - said: "I was beyond lonely. I had the pinnacle of my success, and I went home and was so lonely.

"So, yeah, crazy, though, that sort of the confluence of events where you go, 'I wish…' I had my mom with me and my dad, but I was like, 'Where's my partner, someone that I can share this with?'

"It was one of the most profound moments where I went, 'I've got to get a life' and at the same time, I'm holding this gold statue where you go, 'This is, this is it. This is the highest sort of prize you can get in our industry.' And so grateful and yet so lonely."

Nicole summed up how she felt at the time as "weird".

She added: "I'd love to be able to just, you know, be wrapped in somebody's arms right now.

"I'd love to be around now, something that feels really, 'Oh, okay. This is my real life.' "

The Practical Magic 2 actress - who has two adult kids with Tom and daughters Sunday, 18, and Faith, 15, with Keith Urban, who she was married to from 2006 until they split last year - previously recalled her reluctance to celebrate her Oscar win at the prestigious Vanity Fair afterparty.

Speaking to Dave Karger for his book 50 Oscar Nights, she said: "I'm not a big party girl, so I was going to skip the Vanity Fair party, and everyone was like, 'You've got to go. You've got to walk through the party carrying your Academy Award.'

"I said, 'That just feels like gloating, and it doesn't feel humble.' Like, what? You can't walk through carrying the award! That feels really inappropriate. They're like, 'That's what you do.'

"So I literally walked in, carried it around, was completely overwhelmed, emotional, shaking, and I didn't enjoy it," she said. "I was almost apologetic, which is so stupid. I wish I could have enjoyed it more."

Nicole also recalled her conflicting feelings about her life at the time.

She said: "I was struggling with things in my personal life, yet my professional life was going so well. That's what happens, right?"